Chaos in the Middle East

Hi God guys!

I’ve been meaning to write to you since we opened Tot’s presents. Oh wait, I’m being summoned – someone’s banging her bowl to demand more grapes… I thought slavery was supposed to be illegal.

Hmm, turns out she’s discovered the joy of drumming. Where was I? Oh yeah, about these [...]

Tractor riding Tiny Terror

Hey God gram,

It’s hard measuring a moving target. Just what are you cooking up?

I have to tell you – I went to the Thrift shop today and found a tiny little bike with training wheels

in good condition and pink and shiny, no less for $5. Tot’s not quite big enough but might [...]

Jesus’ whereabouts

REPENT!!! The end must be near!

So, the Godguys got Tot a Fisher Price nativity set for Thanksgiving so she could play with it before Christmas. Within a few weeks, Jesus went missing. We thought he might rejoin us for Christmas, but he didn’t. Then we were convinced he would reappear at Easter – no [...]

Styling in Pink

Here are a couple pictures of Tot in the airport coming back from visiting Gigi. She saw a pink suitcase the same size as her in a Brookstone store and experienced love-at-first-sight. There was a black one right beside it, but after taking her away numerous times and her trotting right back, it [...]

Mr Tot’s non-dweeb-tweets

Me: can we get that pie a la mode? Waitress: yes. Would you like a scoop of ice cream on that too? Me: Ummmmm

public void toddler(){ while(cognitiveAbility > verbalSkilz){ setToddlerFrustration(HIGH); setScream(ON); } }

Favorite typo of the day: Taterboro (for Teterboro, NJ). Think I’ll refer to it as Taterboro from now on (since I [...]

First Birthday

Dear God guys,

Thanks so much for my beautiful birthday outfit! Mom hasn’t put it on me yet (she’s a little slow about these things). I have to tell though — I’ve been playing a joke on Mommy — she keeps wondering how all the animal pairs escape off the Ark. As soon as she [...]

Playmates & Milestones

Dear Tot, (in care of your Mom) because she can read

I have been having a real struggle dealing with Lambert. He has been so depressed since he was told that your Pop wouldn’t be escorting him personally to your house. He is beginning to deal with the “box thing” but it is [...]

Halloween 2007

Dear Godgram and Godgramps,

Thank you so much for loaning me my little lamb outfit – I had so much fun this Halloween with the good shepherd (big bro), Farmer John (dad), the prize-winning chicken little bro and of course, Mary of nursery-rhyme fame (mom)…

They all wanted to be seen with me!!

I [...]

Hello world! Introducing Totsville

When I was young and having trouble sleeping, I would imagine my life with Mr. Right and 2 or 3 kids. Yeah, right! If I had only known, it certainly wouldn’t have been the thoughts to put myself to sleep!

I was a late bloomer for the marriage thing. My starter marriage at 29 was [...]