Hazardous Duty aka How to pill a cat

My dad asked me recently if I got a job. What are you talking about? I asked… His response: You haven’t blogged lately. I guess I’m not the only blogger who’s having trouble keeping up. I was reading a blogger I like who hadn’t blogged in a month. Her excuse – feeding her 2 girls on these long summer days at home — grocery shopping, cooking, cleaning. If only!!! If I only had to deal with food….


I have a cat with a UTI and a 3 YO who can’t remember from one day to the next how to stay potty-trained. The dogs occasionally join the party too. The cat now resides in our shower, but Tot,… well, some would consider that abuse so she’s foot loose and fancy free (and by fancy, I mean… oh never mind). [This is an old picture, but I don't have any new potty pics ...]

In addition to cleaning up messes left and right, I had to give my cat pills, which didn’t go over very well. I tried to follow the directions. And all the advice from vet websites? HA!! My cat has been able to detect medicine in food from the time I got her at 2 months old. She’ll eat around a pill or if it’s crushed into powder and mixed in, she won’t eat it at all. So my only choice is risking my life.

170px-Cat_and_mouseWhiney bits also has pointy bits. I either got peed on or punctured by those pointy bits even when I got assistance from Mr.Tot. Let me tell you, even with the claws restrained, those teeth are killers. Now my fingers know intimately how it feels to be a mouse or bird. And my puncture wounds got infected despite repeated washing, and application of bacitracin. One night, my finger swelled up and I felt awful. I swore I was dying from cat scratch fever, but in retrospect, it may have just been indigestion.

Whiney bits, however, still has some odd behavior. She peed in her basket, on Mr.Tot in bed in the middle of the night on the one night we optimistically let her of out solitary, YES, you read right, and yes, he’s ready to have her stuffed, and she sprayed in her food bowl. Fortunately it didn’t smell like regular pee — it seemed to be more watery but STILL!! I thought cats were supposed to be fastidious, clean, tidy, and averse to peeing where they ate or slept.

IMGP1066[Yes, I'm using this picture again - it's just too good...] So Friday, I had to take her back to the vet for a follow-up to see if the antibiotics had cleared up the infection. Ironically, they couldn’t test because she was OUT OF PEE. They did, however, give me MORE pills. I may have to buy some kevlar gloves. Yes, I have to give my cat anti-depressants, which should theoretically help her and her urinary system relax enough to reach the littler box. However. It only took about 7 attempts to get the pill down her throat during which she peed on Mr.Tot AGAIN and lacerated my thumb, and foamed at the mouth. And see? There’s the pill she spit out right below her chinny chin chin.

IMGP1068 Mr.Tot killed, I mean, pilled her all by himself Sunday night – no problemo, no life threatening injuries, not even any pee, and without assistance. I was mad. But then I thought, hey, I mean HEY! The job’s HIS!!! Woo HOO!!! I’m free!

Then there was last night… which was more in line with my experience. First the front paws and claws popped out of the towel. Then the back paws and claws popped out. The pill was like those re-lighting birthday candles – SURPRISE, I’m still here! umpteen times. After the bloodshed, I had to step in and stick my finger half way down her throat. And she’s STILL peeing on her sleeping pad and spraying on the side of her food bowl….

I made an appointment with the taxidermist for next week. She’ll still be cute and furry, but much more well behaved!

(JUST KIDDING! maybe…)

170px-Toilet_Trained_Cat_22_Aug_2005 If I could just get her to use the potty too….

Oh and Tot? No pills, just bribes, and lots of them. A small toy or book for every day she has no accidents. Sometimes they work, and sometimes they don’t… But they seem to be helping. That and asking her if she needs to use the potty every 17 minutes…

1 comment to Hazardous Duty aka How to pill a cat

  • alecmuffett

    Pilling my cats got a lot easier when I obtained a pair of surgical forceps; they’re bite-proof and you can drop the pill on the back of the tongue where swallowing is (nearly) inevitable.

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